I hope all is going well. My buddy David Alcorn just sent this to me, and I got a ton of inspiration from it. I do not have children, but I know many who read this do. It is by Perry Marshall, one of the most respected Internet marketers of all time. His words from this post/email are beyond true. Enjoy!
There’s a phase of life I call the Compression Zone. It looks something like this:
Kid #3 just arrived. Kid #2 is still in diapers and kid #1 is barely out of diapers. The day starts when one of ’em starts screaming at 3:45am and the sweet honey-dew of sleep is OVER.
Momma either stays at home, which means money is impossibly scarce, or momma goes to work and puts the kids in daycare, which means money is… impossibly scarce.
Everybody’s emotional tank is on “E” for Empty. Emotional support? What emotional support. We’re just trying to hold body and soul together. Intimacy? Oh yeah, that’s two adults, one baby and two toddlers in the bed.
Dad is 31. Works 1 1/2 jobs. He’s the “Go-To-Guy” in both of them. He’s at work by 7:15 every morning, often slamming the door behind him on a swirl of chaos and needy children, trying to not dribble yogurt on his shirt. He turns the key in the ignition in his 12 year old rust bucket and can’t see which station is on the radio because the light’s burned out on the display. He’s got $17 of lunch money that has to last him all week.
His ‘superiors’ regard him as a promising young lad who has a lot of potential and a lot of heart, if only his daring adventures would pay off. Dang, he sure means well but he’s a little angry a lot of the time and he goes off half-cocked an awful lot of the time and seems to lack a certain amount of, um, judgment.
One morning he calls in late because a spat about loading the dishwasher all wrong turned into World War 3, and if we don’t sit down and talk this out right now, Momma’s probably gonna move in with her parents for the next 3 weeks.
Deep in his heart he craves, yearns for, thirsts for… Respect. From… somebody. Anybody. “I wish SOMEBODY would listen to me. I wish ONE of these projects would come through as promised. I wish ONE of these resumes I’m sending out would get an answer from a real manager instead of a form letter.”
And even that would be frustrating because deep down he knows he’s chronically unemployable and he’s terrified of getting trapped into a life of quiet desperation. The horror of getting imprisoned by something as stupid as…
He MUST MUST MUST wrench himself free from this prison. He MUST become the pilot of his own destiny. The entrepreneurial flame burns bright and it won’t be denied.
My buddy Jim Cleary went through Chemo twice. Or maybe it was three times. Jim used to say, “There’s nothing like pain to make you see things REALLY clearly – 20/20. SHARP focus.”
I’m blasting this out to a whole bunch of folks, men, women, everyone. I think almost everyone has been through some version of this. (Actually the real reason is, I don’t have segment of my list for “frustrated 30-something young dads.”)
In case you can’t, uh, tell, I’ve been through this.
Right in the middle of it… when I was just barely starting to get some traction in my life, when just a handful of those crazy projects were starting to yield some fruit… I was sitting in this class one night. The guy was talking about stages of life. It was from some book, I have no idea what book it was.
He described pretty much exactly what I just told you, then he explained what’s coming next. He said, “If you get through this and keep pressing forward, you’re gonna get to a next stage that’s a whole lot better. It’s the harvest season of your life. It’s when things really do start paying off and people do start respecting you, and eventually depending on you.”
I can tell you from experience that what comes later is….
LOTS of people depending on you.
Maybe more people than you can count or even meet.
You may not be putting food on their table, but you’re giving them one of the world’s most precious and scarce commodities….
Cowards are a dime a dozen. They are everywhere.
It takes balls to pour fuel into your dream. (Balls are not exclusive to men, mind you.)
It also takes pain tolerance. Cuz how do you KNOW that you have a dream? Know that you know that you know?
When it hurts so bad you can taste it. When your heart twists like a wrung-out dishrag every time your mind goes to that place, that place of unfulfilled but possible possibilities.
My favorite prof once asked our class:
“What’s the greatest virtue of all?”
Everyone stared at him, and started popping out answers:
Dr. Knoll said, “All that stuff is great but it’s not as great as COURAGE. Cuz if you don’t have courage, none of the others are worth a dime.
Take Courage. And seize the day.
Learn more about Perry here: http://www.perrymarshall.com/
———–End Of Perry’s Words——–
Until next time…
Dr. Timothy Lawler
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